The Shoes...

...with a capital T and a capital S!

Or, I think I've finally found my shoes for the big day!

There are few things that have seriously stressed me out through this wedding planning process.  Invitations were one.  Shoes were definitely another.

I have struggled with this decision for months.

I had a pair of shoes made:

Personal Pic

I found a pair of shoes at Ross:

Personal Pic

I bought an online deal for a 'design your own shoes' website:

My Wedding Shoe Design via Milk & Honey

And, then, I finally ordered this beautiful pair online:

Laina by Miz Mooz via endless.com

They are everything I've been looking for in a shoe - bright color, comfortable, a thick enough heel that I won't sink into the grass and an open toe.  And, as a bonus, they sort of have a Mexican feel to them.  They almost look like the papel picado that's running throughout our wedding.

Now, I can't promise that I won't be buying any more "wedding day" shoes, but I think the pressure I've been putting on myself over this decision is finally diminishing.  Plus, my wedding dress should be arriving any day (the manufacturer shipping it about two weeks ago) and I needed to make this decision final so the alterations can be started.  Eek!

Plus, the bonus?  I still have that credit for Milk & Honey.  Now I can make myself a fun pair of shoes with no wedding related restrictions...  The possibilities are almost overwhelming (and absolutely wonderful).

How many pairs of shoes did you add to your closet before finding 'the ones'?

Stealing Culture

One thing I hadn't planned on feeling while planning our wedding was jealousy...  Ok, maybe a bit of jealously over some fabulous DIY or decorations seen on the web would be normal.  Or, a tiny tinge upon seeing some waif-ish bride wearing the same dress I'll be wearing and looking PERFECT! (Seriously, I saw pictures of at least three weddings with my dress in the last month, one of which was at our venue!)

But, being jealous of my FI and his family because they have more culture?  Is that weird?

I don't really think about my ethnic background very often.  My family is mostly German on both sides, with a little bit of Scottish thrown in on my dad's.  But, we don't actually celebrate our heritage in our daily lives or even on holidays or special occasions.

We do have some traditions around the holidays, but most of them are religious or just odd family-based things (like having baked beans at our Christmas dinner).  There is nothing I can claim as a cultural or ethnic based activity...  And, none of this ever really made me feel any kind of negative emotion until very recently.

When we started planning our wedding, I knew I wanted to incorporate some aspects that celebrated the FI's ethnicity.  Most of his family is very involved with activities and festivals that keep their Mexican roots alive day to day.

Three of his nieces dance with a traditional Mexican Folk Dancing group and perform around Detroit at parades and festivals.  It is so much fun to see them, with the bright outfits and twirling, like this:

from dc.about.com 

(from a search, not anyone in the FI's family, that I'm aware of anyway)

Most of his family can speak Spanish - and his grandmother once asked me if I was planning to learn.  There are traditional Mexican foods served year round, not just on holidays or special occasions.  And, the FMIL still lives in the part of Detroit called Mexicantown, where many of the people share the same heritage.

It's so completely different than my own family and our lack of heritage awareness.

At first, as I picked out items for our wedding, I didn't really think about slipperly slope I was on.  I saw one of our "themes" as vintage with a mexicana twist...  Loteria cards for escort cards and maybe a bit of papel picado for decoration at the reception.  That's all it was.

Then, time went by, and my wedding started to look more and more like inspiration boards with names like "fiesta wedding" or "cinco de mayo wedding":

From Chartreuse Love

Papel picado - yep.  Mexican wedding cookies - probably.  Fans - got em a few weeks back.  There are loteria cards for sure.  Mexican birds/hearts on the invites cut out to look like aforementioned papel picado - absolutely.  Jarritos sodas - planning on it.  Mexican food - at the rehearsal dinner.  Crepe paper flowers - the FI's family is making a bunch for our wedding arch.

It sort of exploded.  And, I'm really pleased with the way things are coming together.  I think it will be beautiful.

But, my original plan was for the wedding to reflect us as a couple and I'm beginning to feel like my part in things is slipping a bit...  Will anyone see me in the details?

I don't want to change anything (and, with only eleven weeks to go, I doubt that I'd have the time to re-do it all anyway) but I have been feeling a bit down about not having much culture to contribute.

Will your wedding reflect your's and your significant other's heritages?  Or, like me, are you coming from a life with few ties to your roots?  How will you balance the details to reflect both of you?

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle (like a bride)

There are very few wedding related ideas that have lasted from the beginning of the planning process till now...  The overall vision of our wedding has changed, a lot, since the engagement.  But, there are some things I haven't been able to shake (from my mind or my to-do list).

One of my absolute favorites is the use of old windows somewhere in the wedding.

They could be used as a menu, listing out yummy choices with vintage flair:

Menu Window from Rustic Wedding Chic

Or, perhaps to present the program of events for guests...  A little more cost effective and environmentally friendly than printing 100+ paper programs, which will inevitably end up in the trash.

Program Window from Timeless Southern Home

Finally, they could be used for any other miscellaneous messages we'd like to share with our guests.  The idea of letting guests sit wherever they want during the ceremony is one of my favorites (probably because our lack of wedding party will leave us without ushers):

Take a Seat Window from Weddingbee

So, with these visions dancing in my head and a Google offer grasped in my hand, I begged casually asked the FI to make a trip with me on Sunday.  Where in the city of Pittsburgh might a bride be able to make a vintage window vision become reality, you ask...

Enter Construction Junction...  (sounds of harps and light shining through clouds)

From Pittsburgh Skyline

Their website bills the store as "Pittsburgh's only non-profit building material reuse retailer".  A bit of a mouthful that ends up meaning a place where you can find donated materials from torn down buildings, items left over at the end of a building/DIY project or who knows what else.

Usually, this is not the type of place you can go with a plan...  It's more of a browse and see what you can find that interests you.  But, this time, I knew I could find what I needed: old windows.

And, find them we did...  We ended up with two windows: one two paned ($2) and one six paned ($6)...  You pay by the pane!  We also bought a long, skinny cupboard door ($2), that should make for another nice sign somewhere, maybe with chalkboard paint.

Plus, we ended up with a few unexpected surprises.  The FI scored a couple pieces of pegboard ($3 ea) for the garage.  

And, the piece de resistance?  Three red locker doors ($15 ea)!  That's right, not lockers that can be used for storage, just the doors with their frames still attached.  Full size, my height or taller, metal locker doors!  Can you tell how excited I am about these?  Why?  Well, we're planning on stripping them down, re-painting them and hanging them as art (eventually... as in when we move into an awesome new house someday after the wedding).  We even talked about putting messages or additional art behind them since the doors still open.  So COOL!

Anyway, I'm not sure how many cities have a place like Construction Junction.  If yours does, I'd highly suggest checking it out.  You never know what great finds you might be able to score for your wedding or otherwise.

Did you find yourself shopping at any unusual places for wedding supplies or decorations?  Do you get ridiculously excited over old, dirty hunks of metal, too?  (Or, is that just me again?)

Getting Older = Free Stuff

I'm going to take a brief break from wedding related topics to talk about one of my (and, I think, most other people's) favorite things: free stuff.

Seriously, coupons, deals and free stuff tickle me.

Once a year, I really bask in the glory of email deals... birthday deals that is.

By just signing up for companies' email lists (I realize its a pain to get that much junk e-mail, but that's what having multiple e-mail accounts is for) I got a ton of free or nearly free coupons.  Some of these may only be useful for people in Pittsburgh or the general region, but I wanted to share...

Baskin Robbins - Free scoop of ice cream

BD's Mongolian BBQ - A free stir fry

Big Burrito - This is one of my favorites and has been for years.  They mail a card worth up to $30 on a dinner, good at any of their restaurants (except Umi) on any day for two weeks (except Saturdays).  (This year, we're going to Casbah for the first time.  So excited!)

Bruegger's Bagels - A free bagel w/ cream cheese if you buy a beverage

Chili's - A free brownie sundae

Cold Stone Creamery - A free creation with purchase of a creation

Dairy Queen - A free mini, small or medium blizzard with purchase of a medium blizzard

Moe's - A free order of queso

Melting Pot - Chocolate covered strawberries when two entrees and a cheese fondue are ordered

Qdoba - One free entree with purchase of another entree

Rita's - A free regular ice

I'm sure there are ones I'm missing, but you get the idea.  So, the lesson is, if you really like a restaurant and you like free stuff, see if they have a mailing list you can sign up for.  Maybe you'll get a nice surprise for your birthday!

Are there any birthday related promotions that have really impressed you?  Are you crazy for coupons/deals/free stuff?  Or, is it just me?

Planning Not to Plan

As the wedding looms closer, it seems to be taking over our lives...  well, mine anyway.

If I meet up with someone for lunch, the first question out of their mouth is "how are the plans going?"  Following that, I face an internal struggle where I want to 1. not dominate the conversation with something so self-centered as my wedding and 2. explode with details that the FI is way past pretending to caring about.

Most of my spare time is spent with another kind of internal struggle, the kind where I debate relaxing and watching TV vs. working on invitations or researching rehearsal dinner locations or reading wedding blogs.

With all the emphasis on the wedding, its easy to lose sight of nurturing the relationship that led to the wedding.

Like this past Friday, some friends of a friend were DJ-ing at a coffeehouse in the South Side.  And, when I initially heard about it, I really didn't want to go.  But, the FI wanted to check it out.

So, after a yummy dinner at Pi, we headed to the Beehive.  We grabbed a couple espresso laced drinks and sat down to catch up with our friend.  Eventually, another couple of his friends showed up and we all started chatting.

We ended up staying a few hours, even longer than the FI originally planned on.  I was just having so much fun talking with people who we didn't know, who had very little interest in our wedding plans, who I could just listen to and talk with about regular people stuff.

It's amazing how refreshing it was to be focused on something so unrelated to the wedding for awhile...  Now I'm trying to be more willing to push myself to relax a bit and enjoy the stuff going on around us.  Like, when the FI brought up the idea of going to see Second City, who's going to be in town the weekend before our wedding, I did hem and haw a bit.  I thought about how many wedding projects might be left at that point.  But then, I thought about taking a few hours to laugh with the man I plan to spend the rest of my life laughing with.  And, I said yes, get the tickets.

Did you try to make time to do non-wedding related things with your partner close to the big day?  How did you make sure you didn't lose focus of the meaning behind the big day?

A Little Help from Hired, well, Help

In one of my last posts, I talked about how much I struggle with letting friends and family help with our wedding projects.  So, it may be surprising to learn that a week after deciding on our date and venue, I was contacting wedding planners.

I had been researching the local event planning companies right along wtih my venue searches...  And, the only reason I waited until after choosing my venue was because several of the reception spaces came with a built-in co-ordinator of sorts.

I figured that if we got married somewhere like the Heinz History Center, we wouldn't need much help decorating, etc.  But, once we picked the conservancy, I knew we'd need some serious help.

I reached out to two companies for more information...  For the life of me, I can't remember the name of the one I didn't choose.  So, I'll tell you a bit about my experience meeting with and hiring my month-of coordinator.

To start, I may be a bit of a sucker for a well put together, well written, clever website and/or company name.  When I started reading the details on A Wish Come True's website, I was impressed and felt like the "As You Wish" package (a.k.a. month-of coordination) was created just for me.  It included a lot of the things that I was most stressed out about (to think I thought that was stressed...  if only I would have known what it was like 3 months out from the wedding, lol):

Review of vendor contracts - I don't know much about wedding planning or contracts.  Another set of eyes looking things over would be a great relief.

Working out details of the day - What time should the cake be delivered?  Did the DJ remember our "first dance" song?  How in the world would all the people I hired manage to get where they needed to be when they needed to be there?  These worries were ones I'd gladly hand off to someone else.

Setting up a day of schedule (and making sure it's stuck to) - Picking the order and timing of when we cut the cake or have our first dance seemed so foreign (I haven't been to that many weddings in my lfie).  Knowing that we'd have someone keeping us on track was another relief.


Dealing with all the decorations - Making sure that all the details I've obsessed over planned turn out the way they are in my head was one of my biggest concerns; and, that was before I even knew how long I'd spend picking out centerpieces and escort cards!  This task is one that weighed heaviest on my mind.  I definitely wanted someone who could take my vision and make it a reality the day of the wedding.

After reading through the package details, I reached out for more information.  A few emails later and we had set up a time to meet and talk through things.

Honestly, I was pretty sure that I wanted to hire Teri before I even met her.  But, that meeting at Panera cemented what I was feeling.  She was bubbly and warm and the exact kind of person who can put you at ease.  We talked about the venue and my (very hazy at that time) vision for the wedding.  She also went over the details of the package a bit more and gave me some more information on her background.

The day after our meeting, after a very brief conversation with the FI (who didn't care too much about this decision), I wrote Teri to say that I'd like to hire her as my month-of coordinator.

I know the wedding hasn't happened yet, but this is a decision I haven't questioned once.  It's been great to have another resource when I have questions (like when exactly should the Save the Dates go out for a holiday wedding?).  Plus, she's checked in on me pretty regularly, which has provided some motivation to get a little more productive when I wasn't quite feeling it.

Later this month, we'll be meeting to review the details and projects I've been working on.  I can't wait to get her opinions on everything and see how she envisions bringing the whole plan together.

Did you hire an event planner?  For all of the planning or just month-of/day-of coordination?  What was your experience working with a planner?  Or, did you go it alone and wish you'd had some help?

And I just bought a $14 pair of shoes...

...from Ross at lunch.  They are gold Nina's, with a huge bow and rhinestones of some sort.

They are a great option for my wedding shoes.

Personal Pic

(I had to see how they'd photograph)

Easy peasy.

Then, I came back into the office and logged onto facebook to check out my most recent two "likes": Shoes of Prey and Milk & Honey.  I saw something intriguing in the Milk & Honey's posts:

Screen shot from Milk & Honey's facebook page

So, I checked out giltcity.com (although the deal was actually listed under Lost Angeles instead of San Francisco).  The deal was great: $145 for a $225 credit (plus a pair of "No More Muffin Top" tights, whatever they are).  I considered...

Then, I jumped over to retailmenot.com to see if there were any coupon codes I could use.  And, I found this:

Screen shot from Retail Me Not

And, it worked!  I saved an additional $29 off the Gilt City deal.  So, I ended up with $225 worth of credit (plus tights) for $116.  

I'm not sure I'll use this for wedding shoes - but I was pumped at the amazing deal...  even if it did make my $14 Nina find a little anti-climatic ;)

Did you find any amazing deals while wedding shopping?  Any tips for saving money on some of the big ticket items?